Week 22/25: From Winter Blues to New Beginnings
Solitude > Stepping Forward
Hi there! For those who don’t know me, I’m a first-year MBA student at Columbia Business School and the voice behind this newsletter. Here, I share my thoughts, experiences, and whatever else happens to brew in my mind—often over a cup of chai.
If you’re someone who prefers coffee to chai, don’t worry—there’s always time to see the light!
The Lonely Winter
As I sit here with my morning cup of chai, reflecting on the past few months, I feel relieved that time has passed. This was the first year I had the opportunity to experience Christmas and New Year’s in NYC. I had a couple of consulting interviews in early January, and instead of heading home to India, I chose to stay back to tackle the interviews and sub-zero temperatures—a decision I came to regret.
With all my friends traveling, no family in the city, and freezing temperatures keeping me indoors, I spent most of my days in my 562 sq. ft studio apartment. December became a blur of monotonous preparation, and eventually, cabin fever turned into a real fever, knocking me out for ten days.
A Nostalgic Solution
While I had the flu, I had no energy to do anything but lie down with my eyes shut. But when I couldn’t sleep anymore, I started listening to Ruskin Bond’s stories on Audible. I still can’t explain it, but hearing the random stories of Indian train rides, the nature in the mountains, and the pre-urbanization life of a town where I spent the majority of my teens brought a sense of nostalgia and internal joy.
It reminded me of the train rides I would take with my mother in the foggy winters, of simpler times when going to the stationary store to buy a new set of pens excited me, and when I had this overarching belief that it would all work out. For some fleeting moments during those torturous days, I escaped the reality of my upcoming interviews and re-lived my childhood.
Inspirations From an Old Man
As December was coming to a close, my energy levels seemed to be falling with it. I was feeling lazy most days, and slowly, my routine was becoming more unproductive. Luckily, one habit I managed to keep in check over the winter was going to the gym. It was there that I often saw an old, visually impaired man with his walking stick, spending hours moving between floors and completing his workouts.
One particularly low day, as I dragged myself to the gym, I saw him again—lifting weights despite the heavy snow outside. In that moment, I felt an immense sense of guilt. If he could brave the snow and push himself, what excuse did I have?
When I got home that day, I reset my 8:45 am alarm and started my next morning at my desk with my cup of chai. While my usual technique is to source inspiration and joy from within, I’ve realized it’s sometimes easier to look up for motivation and look beside for gratitude, appreciating how far I’ve come.
“Look up for motivation, and look beside for satisfaction.”
New Attempts
Now that I’ve had more time to try new things, I’m genuinely excited about the coming months. This past month, I took my first-ever ski lesson, and, as it turns out, I’m even worse than I expected.
After several attempts, I finally perfected a new high-protein pasta recipe—DM me if you want the ingredients.
In my previous newsletter, I had shared a running list of goals I want to achieve during my MBA.
Next month, I’m finally crossing another item off that list. In March, I’ll be performing a 3-minute solo open mic in front of my classmates—something I haven’t done since high school! (And yes, I’m still very nervous about it.) Since I’ve never had any formal vocal training, the thought of performing fills me with a mix of excitement and fear. Stay tuned to find out how it goes!
Until Next Time
Here’s a glimpse at my updated MBA to-do list:
I’ll keep sharing new versions as I cross off goals or add fresh ones along the way. If you have any suggestion on other things I could add, feel free to reach out!
Thank You for Reading!
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~ Email: kanavghai130@gmail.com